You may have noticed I went dark for a while. I am currently in a transition period, the process of recalibration, learning how to go from teacher to manager. This has challenged the systems I had in place to protect my mental health. More on that later – a bit of background first and some lessons I have learned at the end. Background – From Teacher to Manager (Imposter Syndrome)Until just before my post on R&R, I had a highly productive schedule, using the early hours of the morning from 4 or 5 am to around 10 am to read, study or write. After that, I would have breakfast with my family and then cycle to work. This was working really well. I was tired but productive, achieving, increasing my self-esteem and staving off depression. Since then, I have transitioned from being a teacher to a regional manager. This means a big schedule change. My previous teaching hours were between 1 pm-9 pm. I now essentially have a 9-5 office job. My day off was Tuesday. Now it is Saturday & Sunday, but my part-time job was on those days until the academic year ended last week, so I worked three weeks with no day off. I also have to drive to work, which means less exercise and more stress (peak hour traffic, abrupt lane changes and stopping = a mini-heart attack every day!). The naive part of me thought the transition would be business as usual, just with some schedule adjustments. To stay productive, I thought it would just be a case of getting up earlier but I had not taken into account the stress of the new responsibilities and the lack of days off as I changed jobs.My first few weeks have been quite intense as I learn about my new role. AnxietyI have had very little time to feel depressed. What I have struggled with is anxiety.Here is what anxiety looks like for me: racing thoughts, increased heart rate, headaches from stress, impaired concentration and forgetfulness, incredibly focused concentration, and a general feeling of impending doom. In my main job, I have gone from being responsible for teaching around 8 classes to representing the whole company and being responsible (and first point of contact) for around 18 schools. This, and my lack of experience leaves me constantly questioning the decisions I make on a daily basis. I have the title, but I sometimes have the feeling of ‘Imposter Syndrome’.Continue reading “Recalibration (bionic reading)”
Tag Archives: stress
Stress and Anxiety
Fragments The importance of rest and purpose Summary/TLDR at the end. Let me pre-empt this by pointing out that, as the subtitle suggests, I have not been getting enough rest. It follows that I am not writing at my best, but I hope this will serve as a reminder to you to get enough rest!Continue reading “Stress and Anxiety“
Spontaneous Self-Reflection
Go to the end for lessons learnt. Let’s see where this goes… This is an unplanned exercise in regaining some clarity. Writing is, for me, a healing and growing exercise. It allows me to externalise what is important to me at any given time. It helps me to clear my mind and regain focus. TimeContinue reading “Spontaneous Self-Reflection”
General update
t has been a tough few weeks. My mental health has taken a dive and I do not feel able to write anything of quality at the moment.
When I am feeling better I will start writing constructive posts again, but for now, here is an update.
Overwork
It turns out there is such a thing as working too much. I think I have finally found my limit. I am at a crossroads. If I continue down this path I fear it will break me. Mentally or physically. I can already see the cracks forming. When you are inundated with stress and/or lackContinue reading “Overwork”
Stress
Stress can cause a whole range of problems, but you can overcome it by changing your thinking about stress and building systems and tools to deal with it. Each time you overcome a stressful situation you build resilience…
…The tough part is getting to the other side. How do you maintain clear thinking and overcome the challenges you face?
Self-analysis – Depression: a “depressive episode”
That was intense. What happened? If you read my last post “Depression: a “depressive episode”” you will see that I found myself in a pretty dark place. Things escalated very quickly to the point I felt unable to control the situation. It had been a long and gradual process that crept up on me andContinue reading “Self-analysis – Depression: a “depressive episode””
